Weddings are about celebrating love with the people who matter most, but deciding who gets a plus-one can be a tricky part of planning your guest list. So, what is plus-one etiquette, and how can you handle it gracefully? Let’s break it down.
What is Plus-One Etiquette?
Plus-one etiquette refers to the set of social guidelines around inviting guests to bring an additional person (a date, partner, or friend) to your wedding. Clear communication and consistency are key to avoiding confusion or hurt feelings.
Simply put, it answers the question: Who gets to bring a guest, and who doesn’t?
Why is Plus-One Etiquette Important?
Handling plus-ones thoughtfully helps:
- Control Costs: More guests mean higher expenses.
- Avoid Awkwardness: Clear rules prevent misunderstandings.
- Ensure Comfort: Guests feel more comfortable with clear expectations.
- Maintain Fairness: Consistent rules keep things balanced.
Who Should Get a Plus-One?
While every couple will have their own rules, common guidelines include:
- Married or Engaged Couples: Always invite both partners.
- Long-Term Relationships: Guests in serious, long-term relationships.
- Out-of-Town Guests: Offering a plus-one ensures they won’t feel alone.
- Bridal Party Members: Bridesmaids, groomsmen, and other key roles usually get a plus-one.
- Guests Who Only Know the Couple: Solo attendees who don’t know other guests.
Who Doesn’t Need a Plus-One?
- Casual acquaintances or coworkers.
- Guests you haven’t met in person.
- Friends who are single and comfortable attending solo.
How to Indicate Plus-Ones on Invitations
- Be Explicit: Write the guest’s name and their plus-one (e.g., “John Smith and Guest”).
- Specify the Number: Clearly state if a plus-one is included.
- Use RSVP Cards: Include space for the guest to write their plus-one’s name.
- Wedding Website: Provide clear plus-one policies online.
How to Handle Plus-One Questions
Sometimes guests will ask if they can bring someone even if a plus-one wasn’t offered. Here’s how to respond:
- Be Polite but Firm: “We’d love to include everyone, but unfortunately, we have limited space.”
- Blame the Budget: “We’re working with a strict budget and can’t accommodate additional guests.”
- Offer Alternatives: Suggest they attend solo but assure them they’ll have a great time.
Plus-One Etiquette for Guests
If you’ve been invited to a wedding with or without a plus-one, here are the golden rules:
- Don’t Assume: Only bring a guest if your invitation explicitly allows it.
- RSVP Accurately: Include your plus-one’s name on the RSVP if allowed.
- Be Considerate: Don’t ask for a plus-one if it wasn’t offered.
- Choose Wisely: Bring someone who will respect the event.
Managing Plus-Ones on a Budget
If offering plus-ones to everyone isn’t possible:
- Limit plus-ones to married or engaged couples.
- Prioritize the bridal party and out-of-town guests.
- Be transparent about your limitations.
Final Thoughts
Plus-one etiquette isn’t about playing favorites—it’s about creating a balanced, enjoyable experience for everyone while staying within your budget and venue limitations. Clear communication and thoughtful planning will go a long way in avoiding misunderstandings.
So set your rules early, stick to them, and remember: It’s your day, and your guest list should reflect your vision and comfort.
